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Hello, delicious specimen of a human being. Did you look in the mirror and give yourself a high five today? No? Well, here’s your chance!
I’ve had a productive two weeks on the site. I’ve run into founders who fail to consider sustainability in startup pitch decks. I looked at a few thousand decks and realized that less than 1% mention environmental concerns, which I find deeply disturbing. I argue that startup founders, unlike individuals in large corporations, are uniquely positioned to embed values such as sustainability into the very fabric of their companies. Be better.
As I was talking to a founder last week about how they had terrible founder-market fit, and then I started thinking: Damn, no wonder most of my startups haven’t been that successful: I it didn’t have much founder-buyer fit. Quite frustrating, and I came to the conclusion that maybe I just don’t have what it takes to be a founder.
The last delightful rant I went on was in the wake of all the Sam Altman/OpenAI shenanigans where it seemed to turn out that he “didn’t come” with the board. This is corporate talk about suppressing information — extremely bad juju when it comes to the C-suite and the board. In short: No, you cannot lie on your board.
With your regularly scheduled Haje out of the way – and since it was a turkey feast last week, so I was too deeply comatose to write Startups Weekly last week – we have two weeks of startup news to catch you up. Let’s get to it. . .
Car go vroom? Not so fast.
Image Credits: Spencer Platt/Getty Images
Look, I’m all for saving lives, but the government’s recommendation to make Intelligent Speed Assist (ISA) standard on new vehicles is an outrageous overreach. It is my God given right as an American to drive 70 mph in a 65 mph zone and I am especially outraged at the suggestion that they would use a car’s GPS and cameras to limit your speed to the speed limit. I’m all for road safety and all, but . . . come. It’s not even that it’s going to be that helpful in the grand scheme of things: Many fatal accidents happen within the speed limit because of idiots going crazy with their phones and the number of uninsured and unlicensed drivers on the roads (not to mention the sheer number of totally inappropriate junk piles around) are far more dangerous than speeding.
Although rooted in the noble intention of reducing traffic accidents, the recommendation ignites a debate that extends beyond road safety, turning the spotlight violently on the core values of personal freedom, trust in government, and the evolving relationship between of technology and our daily lives.
Well, at least there are still motorcycles, I guess.
In other breaking news (or swoosh in the case of EVs):
Ex-officio CEO: In a surprising development reminiscent of a driverless car taking an unexpected detour, Kyle Vogt, the visionary behind Cruise’s journey from a humble startup to a GM powerhouse, has decided to step into his role as CEO.
The Buy button has now become more dangerous: Amazon, once a humble bookstore, is now gearing up to head into the automotive market, partnering with Hyundai to start selling vehicles online.
I didn’t see that coming: In a turn of events that even a self-driving car didn’t see coming, a Florida judge found that Tesla, led by Elon Musk, knew of flaws in its Autopilot system but continued to let them travel the road in public of use.
So what was this whole Sam Altman thing about?
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Image Credits: Darrell Etherington with files from Getty under license
In the high-tech soap opera world of artificial intelligence, Sam Altman, the former CEO of OpenAI, has found himself ousted in a flurry of drama and intrigue. The story begins with Altman’s dismissal from OpenAI’s board, a move that sent ripples through the organization, leading to the resignation of co-founder Greg Brockman and a trio of senior researchers. As the plot thickened, Microsoft, a key investor in OpenAI, won a seat at the table, albeit as a non-voting observer, hinting at the growing influence of larger tech entities in the AI space.
The story took a moment-worthy twist when OpenAI and Altman reached an “agreement in principle” for his big return as CEO, reshaping the board with high-profile names like Bret Taylor and Larry Summers . That rollercoaster has not been without its share of corporate drama and power plays, including failed negotiations, an attempted merger with rival AI firm Anthropic, and a mass employee threat to quit, all underscoring the high stakes and intense passions that drive the AI industry . In this story of AI ambition, the only certainty was uncertainty, as the future of one of the industry’s leading lights hung in the balance. Kyle has a great summary of what happened, with a link to all of TechCrunch’s coverage and analysis. It’s worth reading, because. . . wow
Overall, we still don’t Really I know what happened behind closed doors, but a memorable scene from the HBO show “The Wire” kept echoing in my head: If you come to the king, you better not miss (NSFW). I can’t remember a time when a CEO walked away from the company they founded and then ended up shaking up the entire board and getting reinstated.
Mark my words: This OpenAI saga is an Aaron Sorkin/David Fincher/Jesse Eisenberg film collaboration waiting to happen.
Other AI news from the past two weeks:
Hey Siri, take a break: Move over, Siri, there’s a new voice in town! Learn how to turn your iPhone’s action button into a ChatGPT-powered assistant ready to outsmart, chat, and fool around.
Is AI-ll broken?: In a plot twist worthy of a tech noir, Apple and Google bypassed AI sensation ChatGPT for the App of the Year crowns. And that makes sense — it competes with core aspects of both companies’ businesses — rather than crowning AllTrails and Imprint as Apps of the Year.
Would you like tokens with this?: Elon Musk’s Neuralink slyly added $43 million to its coffers, proving that when it comes to funding, some companies really can think outside the box.
The lows and lows of Silicon Valley
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Teenage Engineering retro groovebox $300. Image Credits: Teenage Engineering
Welcome to this week’s edition of “Silicon Valley Scandals Weekly” — your one-stop shop for all the sensational stories of tech titans toppling from their digital thrones. This week, we’re serving up a juicy slice of the schadenfreude pie, featuring none other than Mike Rothenberg, Silicon Valley’s latest “disgraced darling.” Connie’s story reads like a cautionary tale for aspiring venture capitalists, with Rothenberg joining the infamous ranks of Elizabeth Holmes and Sam Bankman-Fried, with 21 convictions for fraud and money laundering.
Rothenberg’s saga is the stuff of thrillers! From his dazzling days as a self-proclaimed math Olympian turned Harvard MBA to his heady rise as Bay Area party king, he’s the man who had it all. . . until he didn’t. His journey from the glittering heights of venture capital to the bleak depths of legal woes is a testament to the old adage: What goes up, must come down.
Moar Silicon Valley goss:
Ctrl + Alt + Defeat: After a crippling ransomware attack, leading title insurer Fidelity National Financial faced a disaster that left its customers in a vortex of confusion and panic, their digital lifelines cut off and their financial transactions at a standstill.
Stay classy, AWS: In an era where tech titans are vying to dominate the nascent AI landscape, the AWS keynote felt less like visionary leadership and more like a jibe fest. AWS CEO Adam Selipsky took cheap shots at competitors, revealing more about AWS’s insecurities than its strengths, writes Frederic.
Keeping it fresh in the land of material: Hrrgh, I love Teenage Engineering, and I share Harri’s enthusiasm: The startup’s latest creation makes it incredibly difficult for us not to turn into a niche — a rare feat in today’s tech landscape.
Top reads on TechCrunch over the past two weeks
Bailtm: Warren Buffett’s Berkshire Hathaway, known for its Midas touch, made a rare stumble by exiting its investment in Indian fintech giant Paytm with a 40% haircut.
Let me explain this to you: In a world where “answer guys” lurk around every digital corner, Mastodon’s latest feature emerges as a superhero, offering a shield against unwanted chatter.
Downloading Jira for landing: Plane is soaring in the project management arena, challenging the Goliath Jira with its open source innovation. This upstart aims to revolutionize the way software teams manage projects.
Bringing out the big guns: Skilled AI experts are as rare as macOS kernel panic, so startups are turning to an innovative solution: the fractional AI officer.
So you say there is a way: Google admitted in court that Spotify waltzed into the Play Store without paying the usual entry fees, thanks to a hush-hush agreement.